Two men and a thousand light bulbs

Take two men, hundreds of metres of cable, thousands of light bulbs and the odd plug or two. Mix with a generous amount of nails, a handful of screws, a bucket of clips, several bits of string and a pinch of rope. Using a hammer, screwdriver, drill or pebble, fix to bits of batten, bits of aluminium frame, bits of crumbling wall, bits of tree and bits of house. (Please remember, permission should be sought from tenants before attaching anything to property.) Fixing while climbing, clambouring, or balancing on a precariously leaning ladder is not recommended by the Health and Safety executive!
Stand back at a suitable distance, admire, rearrange; stand back a bit further, arrange back; stand back with a female perspective and completely alter.
nb. Don't forget to test all appliances before fixing in unreachable and dangerous places, to avoid unneccessary, costly and time consumming delays.
Drink copious amounts of tea or coffee, with or without milk and sugar. Take down and replace all faulty appliances. Stand back once more at a suitable distance, preferably in the dark and admire. Rearrange!
Finally when all hope is lost and time has run away screaming; prepare for the day when all the hard work, wiring, pluging in and pluging out, bulb changing and finger crossing has to be switched on. This is the preparation that blends the Clovelly Harbour lights together.
Over the last few years many men and women have been involved with the lights, joined in with the happy banter, voiced an opinion, had a better idea; all while holding the ladder bottom and passing cable ties to the same old fools that end up clinging on for dear life while fixing lights by their teeth! Most happy helpers have fallen by the Wintery wayside, unable to cope with the light intrigue that goes side by side with seasonal designing; or simply moved on up the cobbled street to bless the village cottages with festive neon. But two men Norman Saunders and Barry Perham, have stayed the course, setting the example to continue alone dressing the harbour and bringing joy and delight to all those that brave the cold wind chill factor and cheap toddies, to sing the carols and read the lessons, meet Father Christmas and gasp at the great switch on, which this year shall be on Sunday 7th of December.
It only takes two men, hundreds of metres of cable and thousands of bulbs to make a chorus of blue-nosed, well wrapped, cosy-spirited, carol singers smile. Happy Christmas lights.